The case of the Ex


 Toss that Love in the trash


Picture this… You’re seated on your bed with you man/girl and his/her phone rings, it’s a little after midnight and you can clearly hear it’s a man/woman on the other end. You keep quiet but after s/he finishes s/he calmly informs you that it’s his/her ex who was calling and s/he expects you to be just dandy about it. This must have been the scene in Mya’s mind when she sang the case of the ex but lets import this scenario into real life. Just what role should your current’s ex play in their life?

Unless you’re 12 when you meet your current partner you come with a past; should your past be carried on into the current situation or should it remain just that; the past? I’ve had friends deceive themselves that you continue to remain friends with someone you were once intimate with but I believe that’s all hogwash. Sex is a very funny thing; it’s allowing someone to see you at your most vulnerable with all your defenses down and nobody absolutely nobody can have continued relations with a person without their emotions getting in the way. It’s just how things are! So to believe that you can be in the same room with said person and some of that static does not come up is to fool yourself.

Personally I do not believe in remaining friends with exes it’s just a position I choose to take, I don’t ignore them when we meet neither do I not pick calls or text them back but I do not go out of my way to look for them. Human beings are funny in that we never realize the value of something or someone until we lose them and the gap they once filled in our lives is left vacant. Then we start to notice what exactly it is they did for us. So armed that knowledge and realizing how important your current might be to you how do you handle the ex factor?

I’m antishare and always having the ex in my sight makes me realize that am not the only one who’s been with current; knowing it and seeing it all the time are two entirely different things. That’s how we have songs like that one hit wonder “Nipe usiku moja nawe” come to life.

So what’s your take on the ex?? I’m I paranoid?




  1. I’m with you on this …100%!

  2. Totally completely agree!

  3. so, so, true and i think tht its wise to remember tht one should not eat his/her vomit .when its over its really over….

  4. Case of ex is tricky bt all you have to do is make your contact with them as minimal as you know i still don’t get anyone who can be best friends with their ex and say that no emotions are involved

  5. Don’t know about being paranoid but if the person just wants to be friends (no funny business) then it’s a wise idea to let them try. In a way it will reflect on you how you handle thigs that didn’t work out the way you hoped they would… I believe it is said…

    ‘..The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.’ – Samuel Johnson.

    True they are the past but it is a past that added to who you are today. You don’t have to treasure it but at least recognize the wisdom it instilled. I am friends with all my ex’s with whom it didn’t end badly & so far it’s been a good ride 🙂

  6. when the “real” puts by a reasonable woman, you fell completely persuaded. welldone, Majedw

  7. when the “real” is put by a reasonable woman, you fell completely persuaded. welldone, Majedw

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